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#65 Your words create your reality

31/3/2020

2 Comments

 
Today is the Best Day!! (Do you agree or disagree?)
How have you been feeling lately?
What have you been hearing and saying?
In this video I discuss how your words shape your perception of the world and, in turn, how that shapes your experience of the world. Change might be easier than you think.
Download the Worksheet here: https://livemorelife.kartra.com/page/65ws
Transcript
Look at the language that you have been exposed to, and perhaps absorbing using or allowing into your brain. Isolation, distance, lockdown, unsettled, uncertain, disturbed, crisis. How do you feel when you think and hear those words? Fearful. Stressful? Doubtful?

What about the words you're choosing about yourself? So many people are coming to me at the moment with phrases like "it's hopeless, I'm powerless. I feel anxious. I feel pressured to do things I don't want to do. I can't do things I want to do. I'm scared and falling back to old unhealthy habits. I feel like a failure". And if that's you, ask yourself are those phrases helping? What do you think? I want to offer you today that there's another way.
 
In today's video, I want to remind you that the language you choose creates the feelings that you're having. We experience the world through our interpretation of it. And our human brain has evolved to interpret the world through our use of language. Our thoughts are made up of words. Words have power, words shape our reality. We can use them on purpose. We can use them to create an experience of our life that moves us forward, instead of keeping us stuck.
 
Hi, for those of you who don't know me, my name is Brian Grainger. I'm a life coach and a weight loss coach and I transformed my relationship with myself back in 2006. When I did so, I lost 50 kilos and I've maintained that 50 kilo weight loss ever since. Now I help other people transform their thinking, change their habits and reach their goals, like losing weight for good, or anything else they want to achieve. You can check out more of my work and grab my 10 secrets to long term weight loss at LiveMoreLife.com.au While you're there, you might also want to check out my other videos and grab the worksheet for today's video. It's called language matters. You can find that link in the description as well.
 
You know, two the most profound moments in my transformation, and in my weight loss journey occurred when - I guess number one - when I realised that, in the past, when I thought that I had been comforting myself with food, that I had actually been hurting myself with food. I'd been damaging my health and well being with unhealthy eating and overeating. Part of my long term success has been about changing that language about switching it. I no longer comfort myself with food. I realised that food is not a very good solution to when I need comfort. I'm no longer willing to hurt myself with food.
 
The second big, profound moment came when I realised that it wasn't anyone else's job to look after me or to love me. That was my job. And it was confrontational at the time to realise how much I didn't like myself. How much disregard I'd had created for my body and myself. And that's why I was punishing myself with food. I was taking that easy, not helpful, option because I really wasn't caring.
 
Noticing this though, was a catalyst. I realised that I had to be the one. that no one else was going to do it for me. And in fact, no one else could do it for me. Transformation has to come from within.
 
But once I noticed, I realised that I did in fact care enough to want things to be different. That was the beginning, I realised that I could start now. No matter the circumstance. Maybe that applies to you.
 
The good news is that transformation can start with something as simple as changing the language you use with yourself. Can you switch to start to speak with, and think to, yourself more kindly or compassionately? With understanding and with care? Can you recognise that you are resourceful, you are powerful. You have a powerful brain that can make powerful decisions that become powerful habits.
 
You really are in control of you, in this moment. And whether this is weight loss, or stress about work or financial worries or you're worried about caring for the kids at home, or being concerned about well being and safety, you really are in control of you.
 
I mean, let's take the current situation. You could be frightened or stressed or pressured or scared. Or you could decide to be unafraid. You could decide that it's not a problem. You know? If you understand that the situation is serious and you're acting responsibly - keeping social distance, isolating responsibly washing your hands - do you need to keep reminding yourself that it's serious? Do you need to repeat the litany of language?
 
What if it's just now? What if it's just neutral? What if it's just the circumstance or the situation you're in? The situation we find ourselves all in? I want you to know that the decision to make it mean something is always ours to make. And so if you've been making it to mean something bad, you could choose differently. Could you make it an opportunity?
 
Isn't life just as precious and as beautiful and amazing, as it's always been? I wonder how much you've been opening yourself up to awe, to gratitude, to peace, to wonder at this time? Could you open yourself to those things?
 
This is our normal today. You know, beautiful coach. I admire Lisa Hatlestad said "Waiting it out, waiting till it's over, avoiding retreating, or even just padding with hope, is giving up the beautiful opportunity to live now." This is the time to have the human experience, to feel all of it. So maybe now is the perfect opportunity to grow, to develop, to transform.
 
To help you, I encourage you to maybe take a moment and write down all that is good. If you can't go that far go at least to all that is okay in your life. today. Make a note of all that you have, instead of all that you lack. All of your blessings, instead of all of your troubles. If you downloaded the worksheet I've made space for you to do that each day for the next Seven days. And of course, you could print more copies if you wanted to continue. It's a powerful exercise to remember to balance out the world.
 
Sometimes, with the news, with the constant alerts and updates and social media feeds and worry, it can draw the focus of our attention. So, see what shifts when you take some time to direct your brain towards gratitude and abundance, instead of fear and frustration. You know, our primitive brain, our survival brain is always on the lookout for threats. It's naturally geared towards negativity and danger. And that's a beautiful thing. That survival mechanism has allowed us to become arguably the most dominant species on the planet. To have all of the wonders of our culture and civilisation and technology. It's a beautiful thing.
 
But if we're not careful, we fall in the trap of thinking it's the only thing. And so I think it's important and useful in challenging times to remind ourselves to purposely counteract the negativity by reflecting on the positive, and the beautiful. On the amazing. You know, we get to choose how we interpret the world. What we will bring to it? What will be your contribution? More stress, more worry, or insecurity, more doubt, or something else?
 
If you'd like to do something else, I encourage you to try this exercise as well - and again, I've allowed space to do this each day for seven days - and that is to simply choose a word of the day. Maybe something like Peace or Alive or Enduring, Thrive.
 
When you've chosen your word, the word and experience want to bring into the world, then find a warm patch of sunlight or a cool breeze or a quiet corner or a favourite song, and really just give yourself a moment to connect to that word. To feel the word resonate within you. Love, caring, compassion, peace, calm. Just notice even sometimes just saying it, how you start to experience it straight away. Notice that that feeling that word, that experience, is totally available to you right now. It always has been.
 
So take a moment to connect to that word, find that space and then stay with it. Let it infuse every fibre of your being. And then, when you're ready, bring it to as many moments, as many interactions, in your day that you can. Now of course, there's no expectation of being perfect here. We're a human, with a brain. You'll get distracted by the thoughts, you'll get distracted by events. But then when you notice, simply, gently, remind yourself of the word that you've chosen. That the feeling or experience of it is available to you. And then return home to it. Bring it back.
 
Eckhart Tolle says "the only thing that is ultimately real about your journey is the step that you are taking in this moment. That's all there ever is."
 
So I really want you to consider, what steps are you taking? How are you filling the moments of your life?
 
What if today is the best day? What will you choose to do with it? I'd love you to let me know your thoughts, responses in the comments. Of course, don't forget to download and complete the worksheet.
 
If you do need some help switching your perception of the world at the moment, or discovering and changing those self destructive habits, then I'd like to help you. Sometimes we're so close to our perception of 'how life is' we can't see what's holding us back. That's where coaching really helps. Having a neutral observer who's trained to look out for those unhelpful thinking habits. So if you're interested, let's have a conversation. Head over to LiveMoreLife.com.au and request a free consultation. I've opened up some extra spaces for free consultations to help people at the moment. I can help you discover the habits that you can't even see. You're too close to them. And you can draw on my experience of helping people go about making a lifelong transformation.
 
You really can have a life and the results that you want, especially in these times. Now is the opportunity.
 
Well, if this has been helpful for you, give me a like, give me heart, give me a reaction. And if you're watching on YouTube or on my video blog, don't forget to hit subscribe so that you get notified of each new video each new worksheet when it comes available. If you know someone who might be helped by watching this video, especially at the moment, please tag them in the comments, forwarded it to them or send them the link.
 
Remember, language matters. Words have power. And you can change your world simply by choosing them wisely. Notice the words you're using. Embrace the full spectrum. Life is a a balance, both positive and negative, that's the human experience. Choose deliberately what you want to create and bring into the world. You could start it now.
 
I hope you have an amazing day and that this really is helpful for you. Go have your best day and I look forward to talking with you again soon. Bye for now.
 
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
2 Comments
Jean
3/4/2020 03:59:55 pm

Thank you for the video Brian. I have found 'stay at home' the most challenging, living in a small inner city unit. Fortunately my allotment is a safe place for exercise and keeping my mental health. I am taking special care to nourish my body at this time. Nevertheless I do feel stressed if I allow myself to think 'we don't know when this will end - could be months'. That's what I'm fighting with some days. Fortunately I have the support of my family and my friends via phone and internet. Thank you for your support.

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Brian Grainger link
3/4/2020 05:16:53 pm

Thanks Jean. Well done fort taking the care of your mind and nourishing your body at this time. We might not know how long it will last or how it will end - yet we can ask...In this moment how can I care for myself? What opportunities are available to me? How can I thrive? Keep at it! We can all come through this stronger.

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    ABOUT BrIAN

    After losing my 50 kg I've made it my mission to help others transform their minds, overcome emotional eating and create the life they want to be living. 
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